I don’t follow reality television but it’s hard to not be aware of who the Kardashians are. Last Friday, one member of the show, Bruce Jenner, sat down with Diane Sawyer for an interview to discuss his transition from a man to a woman. Homosexual, Bisexual and Transgender issues are always starting points for conflict but that’s not the angle I’m coming from. Speaking to Diane Sawyer, Bruce Jenner said he always believed he was born with ‘the soul of a woman’, and this is the last time he would appear as ‘Bruce’ before becoming ‘her’. Now whether this is right or wrong is none of my concern but one thing I do understand from all of this, is that it can drain your spirit if you can’t be yourself. So many times we pretend to be someone else for so many reasons. Either because we believe it’s the societal norm, to make or parents and family happy, to be accepted by those around us or to make relationships work. Bruce Jenner has been living a life where he could not be his true self for the past 65 years and I can only imagine how crippling that can be. I know personally what it’s like to be be living a life to make someone else happy and forgetting who you truly want to be. I have found great joy in getting back to my true self and regaining sight of the things I want to accomplish in life, instead of living by someone else’s standards and ideals. One of the most beautiful things about life is that we each have our own and we can live it how ever we see fit. While something may have worked for someone else, it’s not guaranteed to work for you. There is not blueprint for life, for relationships, for parenting. Referring to Pythagoras’ quote ” Man know thyself; then thou shalt know the Universe and God”. Instead of trying to be who society or some else tells you to be, figure out who you truly are and everything will fall into place.
It is a beautiful thing that we’re all different. We have so much to contribute to the world we live in, we have different perspectives on the same things and we all don’t want the same experiences out of life. Growing up, my father believed that his ideals should be your ideals and for some time I accepted his word without question. As I became older and I understood a bit more about life and myself, I realised that I disagreed with much of what was told to me. I became more aware of myself and who I wanted to be and the more this happened, the more I realised that I found no one who was exactly like me. While I may connect with someone intellectually, socially we may not be on par. This also happened with areas such as spirituality, lifestyle preferences, health and fitness choices, education and so on.
Sometimes when people think they love, what they are really admire is the reflection of themselves in the other person. The traits of yourself that you can find in another can be quite appealing and in some instances even appalling. That’s why it’s so easy for some of us to dislike those who are different from us or have varying preferences in life. To have others think and act the way we do tend to give a sense of comfort and assurance that what we’re doing is just and right. To have the feeling of belonging to a group is a natural human tendency. However, to comfortably stand alone knowing that you’re not adopting anyone’s standard for life takes a strength in character that requires time and effort to develop or simply a KMA (Kiss My A**) attitude.
“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.” – Margaret Mead